Why real life isn’t like porn

Enormous pert bosoms, tiny waist, perfectly peachy bottom, 100% silky smooth all over- the body of a porn star is arguably a thing of great beauty. But the reality is most of us aren’t like that, so don’t be surprised if you find a bit of cellulite, asymmetrical boobs or the odd hair here and there.

• All the shouty stuff is a bit over the top

Moaning, lip biting and even screaming can all happen during sex and the odd appreciative noise here and there is a great way to know you’re doing a good job. But don’t expect your girlfriend to shout at you at the top of her voice demanding you go harder or say her name. If she does and she looks like she’s enjoying herself, that’s great- but most of the time it’s not quite as loud as it is in the movies and some girls don’t make much noise at all.

• Rough stuff must be consensual

Even porn that’s not considered to be hardcore contains spanking, hair pulling and throat grabbing.  If you’re in a loving relationship and both partners are into it that’s ok, but it HAS to be something you are both comfortable with. If you want to try something different, talk to your partner first and never assume that treating us like we’re being forced against our will is good way to get us in the mood.

The most important thing you need to know about sex is that it should be enjoyable for both of you. It isn’t a performance, it’s a special and intimate moment which is supposed to be fun. Sometimes things don’t go where they’re supposed to, noises come out of unlikely places and people fall off beds trying to get into strange positions. Laugh, relax and do what feels natural- not what the porn industry tells you to do.